You don’t look gay Comment
How do you come back on that comment? Arrrggghh
As femmes, you and your sweetheart have to come out again and once again and once again. And individuals still don’t get it, for this reason, jaw-dropped coworker sputtering the normal “oh but you do not look gay” bullshit.
You’re not alone– femme invisibility is a concern for numerous lesbians. There’s even a documentary on this subject, and examine out these femme lesbians discussing what it suggests to “look gay.”
But honestly? Your pals ought to know much better, and you need to call them on that shit before it happens once again.
It seems like your pal wonders about your choice to date a femme after being a jock, but didn’t expression things in the finest method. You may wish to sit her down and talk it out– be truthful about your feelings. Let her know how they stomped on you by being the newest in oh, 10 individuals that week to disrespect your relationship options and femme identity.
If you truly don’t have the time for a long convo and wish to red flag her conduct and carry on, a snappy remark will serve her notification.
All you have to SAY is, “Who I date is none of your business,” “Why does it matter to you if my sweetheart is femme?” or “I’m drawn into various kinds of ladies– as long as I’m not hitting on your girlfriend, who cares?” If she keeps up with the dumb remarks, serve your very same remark. Walk away. Stay calm and mature.
It’s up to you which way you wish to play it.
However, from the tone of your letter, I ‘d recommend coming up with ten things you ‘d feel comfortable stating to the next person who questions your right. So you can roll the next phrase off your lips and carry on in life, cause who’s got time for that kind of crap?